When we discuss cheating, we often view it through a single lens, as a physical act. However, cheating manifests in various forms. Clearly, when a partner engages in a sexual relationship with someone else, most agree that it constitutes cheating, unless the partners have discussed, agreed, and accepted such behavior. But what about kissing someone else? For many in our society, it’s an act that borders on cheating and can be forgiven. But how about intimate conversations?

Cheating is a broad concept, and each of us has different tolerances for it, depending on the partner and the relationship. One might forgive a partner for cheating in one instance, but not in another relationship with a different partner. Our perception of cheating is deeply personal.

So, what exactly is cheating? Before we delve into the answer, one thing must be clarified: we cheat ourselves before we cheat our partner. Once we lie to ourselves, we ignite the catalyst to cheat on our partner.

Cheating is intimate, and because intimacy comes in many forms—from thoughts to actions—cheating can occur at any moment and in any space. Take, for example, intimate conversations. A connection through words and dialogue can be deeply erotic and lead to sexual thoughts that we may or may not act upon. But whether the physical act follows or not, is it relevant? Perhaps it is relative, but the thoughts occupy our time, our life, and our feelings. Cheating through intimate conversations is very real.

Emotional Infidelity

Emotional infidelity is another form of cheating that can be just as damaging as physical infidelity. When one partner forms a deep emotional bond with someone else, it can erode the trust and intimacy in the primary relationship. Sharing personal thoughts, feelings, and secrets with someone outside the relationship can create an emotional distance between partners. This type of infidelity can be particularly insidious because it often goes unnoticed until significant emotional damage has been done.

Financial Infidelity

Financial infidelity involves hiding financial activities from your partner, such as secret bank accounts, hidden debts, or large purchases made without the other partner’s knowledge. This type of deception can lead to significant financial problems and a breakdown of trust in the relationship. Money issues are a leading cause of stress and conflict in relationships, and financial infidelity can exacerbate these problems, leading to long-term damage.

Digital Infidelity

In the digital age, cheating can also take the form of online interactions. Flirting with someone on social media, sending explicit messages, or engaging in virtual affairs can all be considered forms of cheating. These actions can be just as harmful as physical infidelity, as they involve emotional and mental energy that is diverted away from the primary relationship. The anonymity and accessibility of the internet make digital infidelity a growing concern in modern relationships.

Breaking a Promise

Is breaking a promise considered cheating? If cheating breaks trust, then an unkept promise is a form of cheating. An offer of what could be given is withdrawn. It is akin to the sexual act; a promise to be faithful was made. Before you give your word, know that you must fulfill it. Not doing so is cheating yourself first. Because cheating is self-harm, the antithesis of love. Cheating begins with a lie to ourselves. We trick ourselves into escaping reality. If you feel compelled to cheat, don’t cheat. Have mercy on yourself then your partner. If the relationship is abusive or unfulfilling, part ways first. Then you’re free to live a different reality, a different life.